GAS UP BEFORE GAS GOES UP

Summer is almost here, and so too is the need to drive. Get your car shined up, gas up and giddy-up.

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GAS UP BEFORE GAS GOES UP – Bernie Bates

Only a short time ago the price of gas was cheaper than day old bread, but with the road trip season coming up, it will take a lot more bread to get down the road. It’s almost as if gas prices are being fixed to coincide with driving season.

I keep telling myself that one of these days there will be a big government announcement: ‘New car uses poop as fuel’. Just think of how symbiotic it would be? We could enjoy a good meal and recycle it on the way back to the grocery store.

I wonder what will power our cars in the future? Will it be batteries, cold fusion or grease from Mickey Ds? There’s a fortune to be made for a smart cookie who is cleaver enough to stop that from happening. I’m sure that the last thing that OPEC wants is for some egghead to discover free energy by mixing sweat, Red Bull and hand cream.

You can mark my words that one day soon we humans will wise up and stop using fossil fuels. Oil spills, smog and vapor trails in the sky will be things of the past. The reason for my optimism is because human nature, like nature itself, will evolve, heal and grow.

This third rock from the sun has been shot repeatedly, suffered extreme heat and ice ages. In only a blink of time man/womankind has climbed out of the trees and is now reaching for the stars. We’ve honed our skills through war and our need to provide a better life for our offspring.

Even a few generations ago our forefathers had to walk to school then our grandfathers drove off to college and now the answers to life’s questions are at our children’s fingertips and a click away. As the old hippy saying goes: “Far out, man!”

You know what’s even more far out, man/woman? Cars are also evolving right along with us. Today’s cars have blind spot alerts, rearview cameras, voice command systems, and this is just the beginning. Soon cars will become automatic, autonomous and anatomically correct for your butt size.

In the not so distant future the sound of a roaring motor will just be as foreign to our offspring as the whistle of a steam engine is to us. The smell of gasoline and burning rubber will only exist in museums and in the memories of old men in old folk’s homes.

Then again – before I make all you gear-heads cry – tomorrow’s personal transportation vehicles will be more powerful than any grease-monkey could have ever imagined.

I’m sure that our ever increasing need for speed and humanities desire to catch up with time will lead to some amazing machines. Just imagine hopping into your very own hotrod and zipping off to New York for pizza – in thirty minutes or less?

But, back to today’s reality and that gas sucking, four wheeled money pit in your driveway. Only our sex drive is more expensive than our love affair with the automobile. First there is the original price tag then maintenance, insurance, cleaning, tires and fuel. The only upside is that you can always get a new model.

THE END

Please feel free to contact Bernie Bates at: beeinthebonnet@shaw.ca